Something I’ve been thinking about a lot this week: are we becoming more protective, or even overprotective, as parents? Or is this just the new norm?
Today Kaden rode his bike to school for the first time. In eight months, Ava will be able to drive alone. So let’s just say the subject has been on my mind.
I started thinking about when I was 10. I could ride my bike pretty much anywhere in the neighborhood with no form of communication, no way for my parents to track me, and really only one instruction: "come home when the streetlights turn on."
Compare that to Kaden riding his bike to school for the first time today.
Yesterday, I took him through a mock run. We rode the route together, went through the streets he’d take, and talked about things to look out for. This morning, we tracked his location as he went and asked him to text us when he arrived.
How things have changed.
I’m not sure if parenting has changed or technology has changed, but either way, we have access to so much more information now. We can know where our kids are, communicate with them instantly, and keep a much closer eye on things than our parents ever could.
That can be a great thing. But I also wonder if having the ability to know everything makes it harder to give our kids the freedom we had growing up.
Because eventually, we have to.
Our job can’t be to remove every risk or make sure they never find themselves in an uncomfortable situation. At some point, they have to ride the bike by themselves. They have to drive the car without us sitting in the passenger seat. They have to make decisions when we aren’t there.
For me, the mindset I’m trying to have is to focus on what’s actually in my control:
Teach good principles while they’re young.
Give them responsibility.
Introduce freedom slowly.
Let them prove they can handle it, and hopefully build our confidence as parents right alongside theirs.
It’s uncomfortable, and I assume it only gets more uncomfortable from here. But I also know we’re raising kids who eventually need to be capable without us.
I’m sure I’ll have a lot more to share on this once Ava gets her permit in the next month or two. For now, I’m going to keep reminding myself that the goal isn’t to protect them from everything.
It’s to prepare them for when we can’t.
